Judgement
Sometimes when I’m on social media, I sit back and watch how people interact with each other (in weight loss groups). Sometimes it feels like watching a bunch of children bullying other children because they feel so insecure about themselves and their weight, that they have to blame/judge/put down other patients who haven’t been successful (or as successful) with a procedure (or diet) just to boost themselves up.
You would think that anyone in any kind of weight loss group would be more supportive and understanding towards those also struggling with the same thing. You would think of all the people in the world, the ones who’ve tried every diet imaginable before resorting to ESG or bariatric surgery would understand the concept of something just not working for someone, but working for others. This just doesn’t seem to be the case at all, and is rather baffling to me.
Blame
I have noticed that whenever ESG fails, the very first person who is blamed is the patient. There’s a whole facebook group devoted to people who’ve had this procedure fail. They’re accused of diet non-compliance, or being in denial about their habits, or binging. At a certain point I even did a serious self-assessment on whether *I* could be one of those patients who is in denial, or if I was being non-compliant unintentionally, without even knowing. Questions I asked myself:
- Did I follow all the pre-op and post-op liquid diet instructions? Yes, I did. I never cheated, not even once. My husband watched me measure, puree, liquify, pre-freeze tiny portions etc… and he can also vouch for this.
- Did I lose weight? Yes. Weight loss didn’t stall until restriction was lost and I couldn’t stay under 1,000 calories anymore without severe hunger.
- Did I ever eat so much I was uncomfortable, or vomited? Truthfully, once I ate to discomfort shortly after starting solids. It wasn’t intentional, I just misjudged how much I was putting in. I was super careful after that. I hate that sick feeling of “too full”.
After stepping back and viewing myself from a magnifying glass, and answering the above questions, and talking to those who know me, I came to the reasonable conclusion that ESG didn’t fail due to non-compliance or denial. Although, I’m still accused of this from others who’s ESG stitches have held long term. But those people are the one’s who are choosing to believe something untrue, and I can’t do anything about that.
The truth is, ESG can fail in a way VSG cannot. It has stitches that (for whatever reason) can pull through the stomach muscle, causing the procedure to fail. That is a fact. We don’t know how often this happens, but one study suggests around 5% of the time (within 6 months). Real, unbiased research is definitely needed in this area.
For those who repeatedly say “This is a tool, you must change your eating habits for it to work long term” as a way to write off those people who’s ESG ends up failing… Yes, this is technically true. But ESG is supposed to be a permanent tool. If anyone is looking for a temporary weight loss solution, there are better, less invasive options than ESG (such as balloon, or medications, or extreme diets) that also don’t cost $12,000.
Believing in Me, Once Again
I’ve come to terms with the fact that people will think what they want. People will judge. People will blame. People will be downright mean sometimes. I’m just not going to let it bother me. I know I will be successful with VSG because I was so successful with ESG (until the stitches failed). I’m confident I will be able to follow all the rules because I already have… twice. Once I did an entire month of liquid, even with stitches that failed and I was absolutely starving the entire time. I definitely can do this!
Putting ESG in My Past
“There is no such thing as failure. Only learning experience.”
Unknown
This will likely be my last post on this blog. I’m moving on from ESG, and putting it in my past (where the last 2.5 years belong). I’m leaving this site up for the time being, but will be documenting my ESG conversion journey on www.ESGConversion.com
I hope this site has been of some use to some!
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